The first of March 2014.... We had talked online and on the phone for a week. I had taken a train 400 miles but had to wait almost three hours before she turned up and two before she even answered my calls. She had forgotten to turn it on.... In control of things even before … Continue reading She came up those stairs
Jag prövar att börja skriva även på Svenska. När jag skall berätta min egen historia så blir det så mycket enklare att skriva på modersmålet till människor som lever i mitt eget land och egen kultur. Skälet att jag började på Engelska vara mycket att jag var rädd för att bli alltför ensam här om … Continue reading Nya tag….. på Svenska
It's now more than 6 weeks since I declared that I would begin writing short simple posts on a daily basis...... I claimed it was because of some perfection complex..... Well this might be true but what is behind that? FEAR, pure primal fear. Fear of being attacked, criticized, accused, belittled. Fear of not being … Continue reading It’s Fear that keeps me from writing.
I had so many ideas about this site/blog but I am stuck not getting further then my Instagram account. I guess the problem is that I aim way to high..... Perfection..... I have no right o bother you unless I really have something to say, some "perfect" article that "explains it all", well at least … Continue reading I am stuck with my writing (and my life)
The official name is actually Adult Children of Alcoholics / Dysfunctional Families though at least here in Stockholm it's mostly about understanding and healing from narcissistic abuse. I found out about these guys perhaps some six weeks ago, in fact through a person in this online support group Complex PTSD Recovery who turned out to … Continue reading Adult Children of Narcissists
Step one in the process of breaking free from narcissism, identify the Enemy.... https://youtu.be/J4-2LFCS6iM If you don't take the shortcut and put all the blame outside of you, you will will find that it lives inside your head. This is not you are though, this is who "They" expected you to be.... who you … Continue reading Know your Enemy……
Writing about my ex I used the words Evil Ways and of course my brain made yet another musical association. Evil Ways...... Santana....? Yes its Santana and he has described Narcissistic partners even better or what do you think? https://youtu.be/EVeHHmGcoNk And i kept searching...... Anyone who can relate? https://youtu.be/FYcyf2Mu0-c Ok, Evil Ways..... with a very … Continue reading She is not there…….
There is A LOT about narcissism on the internet though very much of it is from a Victim perspective, including stuff from well known coaches and therapists..... It's all about Them.... They are Evil and You/We are targeted simply because that we are so Good. The cruel truth about narcissistic relationships is that you are … Continue reading It takes two to Tango
I have met my ghosts I have been able to get rid of my own false (narcissistic) self though I am still fighting my fears of being unseen/rejected. Every step I take to make real connection, to tell some more of my history is a step that puts me at high risk of being triggered … Continue reading Immobilize without Fear
Yes, so far you are. I still love the woman I saw behind your walls though I realize that those walls are too strong for me to brake through. You opened my eyes , you made me feel more loved than I had ever felt. I almost began to believe you when you said it … Continue reading Songs to the love of my life! so far….